Author Topic: Bad jokes thread  (Read 139519 times)

Iceea

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #315 on: January 19, 2017, 10:56:28 AM »

What did one dog say to the other?

Spoiler: show
I don't know, I don't speak dog...
:usa: obviously :france: too many yrs ago
:chap5: :chap6: :chap7: :chap8: :chap9: :chap10: :chap11: :chap12: :chap13: :chap14: :chap15: :chap16: :chap17: :chap18: :chap19: :chap20: & :book2:

You're only given one little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it!
Robin Williams

JoB

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #316 on: January 24, 2017, 04:14:56 PM »
What did one dog say to the other?

Spoiler: show
I don't know, I don't speak dog...

Reminds me of another one ...

"Can you play the violin?"
Spoiler: show
"Dunno, never tried it yet ..."
native: :de: secondary: :us: :fr:
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Iceea

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #317 on: January 25, 2017, 10:16:09 AM »
from a coworker of mine

There was a special on TV about plumbers and some of the scams they routinely pull

Spoiler: show
The FBI is warning of a crack down
:usa: obviously :france: too many yrs ago
:chap5: :chap6: :chap7: :chap8: :chap9: :chap10: :chap11: :chap12: :chap13: :chap14: :chap15: :chap16: :chap17: :chap18: :chap19: :chap20: & :book2:

You're only given one little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it!
Robin Williams

urbicande

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #318 on: January 25, 2017, 12:38:28 PM »
A diplomat is a person who, when asked their favorite color, answers "plaid"
Keep an eye on me. I shimmer on horizons.

Survivor: :chap7: :chap8: :chap9: :chap10: :chap11: :chap12: / :book2:   :chap13:   :chap14:  :chap15: :chap16: / :book3:  :chap17: :chap18: :chap19: :chap20:  :chap21: / :book4:

:A2chap01:

Fluent:  :usa: :uk: :canada:
Basic conversation:  :france: :germany:
Learning: :sweden: :finland:
A couple of words:  :spain: :italy:

JoB

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #319 on: January 25, 2017, 01:15:40 PM »
A diplomat is a person who, when asked their favorite color, answers "plaid"
Actually ...
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Shine

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #320 on: February 02, 2017, 11:48:03 AM »
My mom is currently in Berlin, so she sent us a message:
the place I'm staying at is on Ohmstrasse, almost the same as when I was a kid living just off Resistance Square.
Native :italy:
Fluent :uk: :germany:
Want to learn :norway: :finland:

Survived:        :chap5::chap6::chap7::chap8::chap9::chap10::chap11::chap12::chap13::chap14::chap15::chap16::chap17::chap18:

urbicande

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #321 on: February 02, 2017, 02:22:29 PM »
My mom is currently in Berlin, so she sent us a message:
the place I'm staying at is on Ohmstrasse, almost the same as when I was a kid living just off Resistance Square.

:D
Keep an eye on me. I shimmer on horizons.

Survivor: :chap7: :chap8: :chap9: :chap10: :chap11: :chap12: / :book2:   :chap13:   :chap14:  :chap15: :chap16: / :book3:  :chap17: :chap18: :chap19: :chap20:  :chap21: / :book4:

:A2chap01:

Fluent:  :usa: :uk: :canada:
Basic conversation:  :france: :germany:
Learning: :sweden: :finland:
A couple of words:  :spain: :italy:

Fauna

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #322 on: February 03, 2017, 09:19:02 AM »
Fair warning, this one is pretty dark. If you have humor more advanced than that of us five year olds, you might just find it way past the borders of tasteless and well into straight down uncomfortable. You've been warned :D

Spoiler: show

What does the dog say when you drench it in gasoline and put it on fire?
WHOOF!

What does the cat say when you put it in a freezer and then split it with a chainsaw?
Miiiiiiiaaaaaaooooouuuuu....

wavewright62

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #323 on: February 03, 2017, 04:33:57 PM »
My mom is currently in Berlin, so she sent us a message:
the place I'm staying at is on Ohmstrasse, almost the same as when I was a kid living just off Resistance Square.
*facepalm*   :V  :V
Kudos for sharing one that's not currently doing the social media circuits.
 ::)
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JoB

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #324 on: February 05, 2017, 04:18:29 PM »
the place I'm staying at is on Ohmstrasse, almost the same as when I was a kid living just off Resistance Square.
"Ihr da ohm macht doch eh' watt ihr volt!"
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Iceea

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #325 on: February 05, 2017, 08:05:48 PM »
My mom is currently in Berlin, so she sent us a message:
the place I'm staying at is on Ohmstrasse, almost the same as when I was a kid living just off Resistance Square.

the EE in me will be groaning for days........................................
:usa: obviously :france: too many yrs ago
:chap5: :chap6: :chap7: :chap8: :chap9: :chap10: :chap11: :chap12: :chap13: :chap14: :chap15: :chap16: :chap17: :chap18: :chap19: :chap20: & :book2:

You're only given one little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it!
Robin Williams

Double H

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #326 on: February 11, 2017, 07:14:39 PM »


Get it?
Spoiler: show
Spring's just around the corner
Pretentious? Moi?

Juniper

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #327 on: February 12, 2017, 02:58:47 AM »


Get it?
Spoiler: show
Spring's just around the corner


(-_ど)

Okay but what do you call somebody who has no body and a nose? Nobody knows.
« Last Edit: February 12, 2017, 03:14:21 AM by Juniper »


Native: :usa:
I guess I'm pretty okay :france: :southkorea:
Learning: :finland: :arableague: :sign:

Iceea

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #328 on: February 20, 2017, 12:09:43 AM »
Overheard at Lego Land today:

What do you call a deer with no eyes?

Spoiler: show
no idear
:usa: obviously :france: too many yrs ago
:chap5: :chap6: :chap7: :chap8: :chap9: :chap10: :chap11: :chap12: :chap13: :chap14: :chap15: :chap16: :chap17: :chap18: :chap19: :chap20: & :book2:

You're only given one little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it!
Robin Williams

JoB

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #329 on: February 20, 2017, 06:07:25 PM »
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
What do you call a postman without 'o's?
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Mailman.
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