Things Mikkel Madsen is Not Allowed to Do:

[VibratingText]

Pictures of frogs are not a substitute for currency, no matter how 'rare' these 'pepes' are.

[OwlsG0]

I will explain where I got this picture, and remove it from the places where our cats tend to gather.


I am not allowed to communicate only with memes.
I may not refer to my superiors as "uncultured swine" for weeks after they not only prevent me from communicating only with memes but also have the nerve to ask me what a meme actually is.

If  I say 'Deez Nuts' one more time I will be severely sanctioned

[PickleChip]

After "The Sequins and Glitter Incident", I am no longer aloud to give any fashion advice.

[Athena]

Pictures of frogs are not a substitute for currency, no matter how 'rare' these 'pepes' are.

I am not allowed to ride a unicycle into camp saying "here comes dat boi !!"

I am not allowed a unicycle for any reason.

[Tr]

I am not allowed to ride a unicycle into camp saying "here comes dat boi !!"

I am not allowed a unicycle for any reason.

I will explain, in detail, where I got that unicycle.

[Ix]

I am no longer allowed to explain where I got a unicycle from.

[VibratingText]

I do not have CHIM and I cannot just 'handwave' a unicycle into existence.

[OwlsG0]

While the base agrees I have an amazing singing voice, it is not appropriate to deliver my reports in a musical form

[Athena]

I do not have CHIM and I cannot just 'handwave' a unicycle into existence.

I am not, and have never been, a disciple of "Talos", and I am not allowed to preach his power in the mess hall.

I will explain where I found my "Talos priest robes".

I will hand over any and all "artifacts of Talos" to the officers.

Including my "Shrine of Talos", which I must admit is actually just a weird looking rock, and not "an image of our godly leader".

[Ix]

I am not allowed to list any fellow workers as '@#$!!ing ripped' in my reports, even though she is, I swear it, and I am terrified,

[VibratingText]

I am not allowed to list any fellow workers as '@#$!!ing ripped' in my reports, even though she is, I swear it, and I am terrified,

I am not allowed to refer to Sigrun as a 'bara waifu'.
Even if I tell her what that is.
Especially now that she knows what that is.

[OwlsG0]

I am not allowed to refer to Sigrun as a 'bara waifu'.
Even if I tell her what that is.
Especially now that she knows what that is.

I will tell Captain Eide to stop referring to me as 'husbando', even if it is a joke,
We are no longer permitted to speak to each other during office hours because if we cannot act as adults around each other then we will not be treated as adults

[Solokov]

I am to no longer attempt to teach Sigrun the subtleties of sarcasm in, as the admiral put it, "a fashion of trial by fire", especially while giving her important information.

[OwlsG0]

I am to no longer attempt to teach Sigrun the subtleties of sarcasm in, as the admiral put it, "a fashion of trial by fire", especially while giving her important information.

Nor 'trial by stone'
Nor 'trial by sword'
No one else has ever seen Jim Henson's 'The dark crystal' and thus do not know what I am talking about
No one else knows who Jim Henson is and thus do not know what I am talking about
I will dispose of that green frog puppet immediately

[Antillanka]

I will not change places with my twin brother...

(I had a loooooong and funny while thinking of the possibilities)