“You know... I’d have questions. About that... stuff. But I don’t know what to ask, so it doesn’t matter that you wouldn’t understand my question. And I wouldn’t understand your answer.”
The words came back to Mikkel at the oddest times, which was odd, as they hadn’t even been directed at him. He’d only heard them because he’d suggested that the repair crew (currently Tuuri and himself) working on fixing the damage the troll attack had caused should take the occasion of Emil’s departure to have a quick break to restore their (Tuuri’s) equanimity, and so he’d stepped away so Tuuri could do so, which had brought him into earshot of Emil’s remarks to Lalli.
Regardless of where they’d originally been directed, however, the statements disturbed something in Mikkel. It was really quite irksome, the most irksome part being Mikkel’s inability (for the moment) to discern exactly why he was so disturbed.
When enlightenment came, it hit Mikkel like a bombshell: Emil’s statement was mature, humble, and wise.
This did not comport in the least with Mikkel’s prior assessments of Emil.
Sigrun had presented Mikkel with a similar conundrum in the encounter with the sjødraug, acting in a reasonable and levelheaded way that Mikkel would not have thought was within her capacity.
The word “self-doubt” was one Mikkel held as a virtue--for other and supposedly “lesser” people than himself. While he liked to consider himself open-minded, the great bulk of his knowledge, ideas and conclusions were utterly certain in his eyes, so why should he even consider doubting them, or himself for holding them as such?
Two misjudgments of character in a row might be just cause, though, even aside from the Event Mikkel was constantly trying not to think about.
Perhaps this could be attributed to the whole ‘Eric Affair’ and its fall-out; certainly, everyone else (excluding Reynir, of course, as he hadn’t joined them until after that point) was still feeling the effects of that horrible business, so why shouldn’t Emil have used the occasion to do some growing-up?
Eric. Now there was someone Mikkel had decidedly not misjudged, even if the Stingy Quartet (as Mikkel called them whenever he had to clean up a mess caused by their stinginess) had.
Had ‘Eric Smed’ even been his real name? Somehow Mikkel doubted it.
But all this remembrance was just so much diversion from what Mikkel should be contemplating, hard and/or painful though it may be: his possible misjudgment of Emil, and what that might mean for the mission, the team, and Mikkel personally. The healthy mind liked pulling such tricks so that it stayed healthy.
Could it be that Emil only acted mature around certain people? His interactions with Lalli, as contrasted with those he had with Mikkel, seemed to argue in favor of this.
Could it be that some people tended to bring what maturity Emil possessed to the fore? Lalli fit the bill here again, with Sigrun (for all her own faults) another possibility.
Could it be that some people--like Mikkel himself--actually caused Emil to act more childishly?
Mikkel winced. The last possibility was all too likely.
What did this mean for the crew, though?
A sharp, acrid smell hit Mikkel’s nostrils, reminding him that he needed to keep stirring the stew that was to be their dinner. Well, hopefully a burnt dinner would be the only consequence of Mikkel’s misjudgment...
