This is a story that I randomly entitled "What If A Lot Of Really Bad Stuff Happened?", just because I couldn't think of anything else...
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Year 91, a meeting in the offices of the Nordic Council - The Report on the Danish Book Salvage Disaster:
"The meeting will please come to order." (Murmurs and chair-scraping)
"The investigation into the disaster of the expedition to the Danish mainland has concluded. All findings and conclusions are recorded in your copies of the report." (General shuffling of papers)
"As you all know, the aftermath of this apparently insignificant venture has been potentially disastrous. It was only desperation and sheer dumb luck that prevented a catastrophe." (Murmurs and whispers, plus hostile glares at a group of four, who look like they are attempting to sink through the floor)
"For a start, this venture was very poorly planned, founded in greed and financed on a shoestring. The equipment was utterly inadequate for the task - the expedition crew, undermanned and under-trained."
"From the very beginning, the expedition appeared to be jinxed - the team leader and the expedition driver both caused serious property damage due to wild driving, even before leaving Øresund Base. Shortly thereafter, the Øresund Bridge, the only land connection to the Danish mainland, collapsed after the expedition vehicle passed over it."
"From that point, the disasters simply snowballed. By the time of the emergency evacuation:
- The expedition had disturbed a nest of previously unknown - and exceptionally hostile - spiritual entities. An attack by these ghosts and an army of trolls and beasts, led to the injury of the team's driver/mechanic/skald by an ambushing troll. Luckily, the injury was not caused by a troll's bite, but by its serrated tail, so the injury was not infectious but merely disabling,
- A Finnish mage (operating from Mora) was forced to over-exert himself in order to defend the expedition from the sheer numbers of attacking trolls and beasts. This effort was very nearly fatal and he is currently convalescing after spending two months in a coma,
- The scout, forced to perform the tasks of both day and night scout by himself, began suffering from advanced sleep deprivation. He began hallucinating about trolls coming through the walls and had to be restrained and heavily sedated after attempting to stab the medic who he believed was turning into a Troll,
- The expedition Cleanser barely stopped a troll attack on the vehicle with fire-bombs and flamethrower, incidentally incinerating a large proportion of the books they had already salvaged, plus burning off his hair and eyebrows,
- The medic was forced to amputate the team leader's badly infected arm without general anaesthetic,
- Clumsy attempts by the remaining able-bodied crew to drive the vehicle resulted in it exploding, after successive collisions eventually jarred loose a canister of incendiary fuel, destroying every single remaining book the team had collected, plus most of the food and a large crate of decorative candles,
- The expedition team was forced to travel to the emergency evacuation point on foot. The spirits followed the expedition members to the evacuation point, where the ship's crew was attacked, first by a horde of spirit-driven Beasts and Trolls, then by the ghosts themselves."
"By sheer luck, the ship was saved from the spiritual attack by the chance presence of a stowaway who just happened to be a novice mage. His untrained skills were enough to halt the advance of the spirits long enough for the ship to get away from the dock - and as you know, these ghosts cannot travel over water."
"The ship, however, was seriously damaged by the Troll attack, with a number of injuries suffered. The ship had insufficient able-bodied crew or spare parts to make the necessary repairs in order to make it back to the quarantine station. The ship was leaking badly, the weather was getting worse, so a radio distress call was sent. The ship was so close to sinking that the crew was preparing to take to the lifeboats, but fortunately, the crew were rescued by a fishing boat, despite high seas."
"But even then, there was trouble. Apparently, the fishing boat's captain had previously encountered the expedition's personnel and was initially unwilling to let them on board, bearing some ill-will towards one of the organizers." (The eldest of the group of four squirms uneasily)
"When the ship docked at the quarantine station, more havoc ensued. A particularly agile troll had managed to cling to the hull of the evacuation ship during the chaos of the battle. It had remained clinging to the side of the ship until the crew was rescued by the fishing boat, then transferred unnoticed to that ship's hull during the storm."
(*Note: The ship's cats naturally responded to the presence of the troll, but the crew assumed they were reacting to the large number of Sea-Beasts in the vicinity.)
"When docking, the troll launched its attack, taking the personnel completely by surprise and causing a number of casualties. It nearly broke out of the quarantine zone and into the residential quarters before being killed. The facility was severely damaged and was out of commission for months, until repair and quarantine procedures could be completed."
"In conclusion, this report finds that this expedition was not only poorly planned, but also premature. It recommends no further expeditions into the deep Silent World until human society has sufficiently recovered in numbers and can make such a venture without stirring up creatures that threaten the very existence of human settlements." (Glares now so intense, the four are in danger of spontaneously combusting)
"Now, regarding punishment for the damage wrought by this ill-advised venture - The Nordic Council recommendations are as follows:"
"Firstly - heavy fines for the expedition organizers." (Groans from the group of four)
"Secondly - the Västerströms have to do all of their own future baby-sitting." (Screams of anguish from the Västerströms)
(Meeting ends)
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