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Author Topic: Bad jokes thread  (Read 139299 times)

JoB

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #120 on: May 21, 2016, 10:05:41 PM »
Quote from: Tr on May 21, 2016, 09:55:50 PM
Ugh, yeah, I know. We've got those here in the States, too.
Spoiler: show
I got stuck in one once, and I had to crocodial 911.

See, that's why turtle-based ones are just so much better.
Spoiler: show
In case you didn't bring your own, you'll always have a courtesy shell phone at hand. That can be a gharial life saver.
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Noodles

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #121 on: May 21, 2016, 10:45:40 PM »
Quote from: JoB on May 21, 2016, 10:05:41 PM
See, that's why turtle-based ones are just so much better.
Spoiler: show
In case you didn't bring your own, you'll always have a courtesy shell phone at hand. That can be a gharial life saver.

Spoiler: show
well you're pulling out the bad puns straight from the gecko
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meshebe

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #122 on: May 22, 2016, 06:46:16 PM »
I saw this one today:

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says "Five beers, please."

=D
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Anna

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #123 on: May 22, 2016, 10:24:44 PM »
A Tolkien-themed one
A Man, an Elf and a Hobbit walk into a bar.
…Well, the Elf and the Man walk into a bar. The Hobbit walks under it, laughing.
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Double H

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #124 on: May 23, 2016, 10:43:44 AM »
Quote from: Anna on May 22, 2016, 10:24:44 PM
A Tolkien-themed one
A Man, an Elf and a Hobbit walk into a bar.
…Well, the Elf and the Man walk into a bar. The Hobbit walks under it, laughing.
Oooo this one is good.
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Anna

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #125 on: May 23, 2016, 12:07:54 PM »
Quote from: Double H on May 23, 2016, 10:43:44 AM
Oooo this one is good.
Thanks, I made it myself.  :D
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urbicande

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #126 on: May 25, 2016, 02:07:26 PM »
Why is an icy walkway like music?

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Because if you don't C-sharp, you'll B-flat
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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #127 on: May 26, 2016, 02:41:57 AM »
Why did Bob give his car a singing lesson?

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Because his mechanic told him the engine needed tuning
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Lazy8

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #128 on: May 30, 2016, 10:24:25 AM »
See? See? I told you the AC was on too high!

Spoiler: show
Even my computer is freezing!


...

I'll just show myself out now.

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Tr

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #129 on: May 30, 2016, 10:31:28 AM »
Quote from: Lazy8 on May 30, 2016, 10:24:25 AM
See? See? I told you the AC was on too high!

Spoiler: show
Even my computer is freezing!


...

I'll just show myself out now.

*slinks away into Corner of Shame*

Well done.
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Athena

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #130 on: May 30, 2016, 11:01:10 AM »
Quote from: Lazy8 on May 30, 2016, 10:24:25 AM
See? See? I told you the AC was on too high!

Spoiler: show
Even my computer is freezing!


...

I'll just show myself out now.

*slinks away into Corner of Shame*

Is it wrong that at first I thought AC meant Assassin's Creed, and its a big game to run so your computer couldn't handle it and froze? ::)
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Iceea

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #131 on: May 30, 2016, 09:48:48 PM »
I'm going to stop asking "How dumb can you get"

people seem to be taking it as a challenge

and

Musician:
Someone who packs $5K worth of gear into a car,
and drives 100 miles, 160 Km, to make $50...
« Last Edit: May 30, 2016, 09:57:17 PM by Iceea »
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Róisín

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #132 on: May 30, 2016, 10:42:28 PM »
Iceea: isn't that just what musicians do?
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Purple Wyrm

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #133 on: May 31, 2016, 12:22:41 AM »
Well if we're going to get started on musician jokes...

How does a band tell that the stage is level?
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The Drummer is drooling out both sides of his mouth


Did you hear about the band that locked their keys in the van?
Spoiler: show
They had to break a window to get the Drummer out
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Buteo

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #134 on: May 31, 2016, 01:14:15 AM »
Purple Wyrm, who does the drummer tell those jokes on?
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