Things Mikkel Madsen is Not Allowed to Do:

[Anna]

I am to surrender all materials concerning the pre-Rash fictional epic "Star Trek" to my immediate superiors.

[PickleChip]

I am to surrender all materials concerning the pre-Rash fictional epic "Star Trek" to my immediate superiors.

Non of the ships or boats are named "The Starship Enterprise"
I am not aloud to tell people the are named that
I am not aloud to tell people the ships fly
I am not aloud to enlist the mages to help with that
I am not aloud to try and make that happen myself

[Keeper]

I am not allowed to claim that works of fiction from the Old World are actually true.
If I make any claims that materials from the Old World are nonfiction, I must have at least two sources to back me up.
I cannot be the author of aforementioned sources.
I cannot bribe my colleagues to be my sources.
I cannot bribe my superiors to be my sources.
I am not allowed to bribe anyone, for any purpose.

[PickleChip]

I am not aloud to give the mages Hogwarts letters
I am not aloud to sort them into Hogwarts houses
I am not aloud to force them to wear house colors

[Tr]

I am not allowed to claim that works of fiction from the Old World are actually true.

Nor am I allowed to claim that any work of fiction from the Old World is actually a prophecy from an ancient mage.
I am not allowed to try to make any such "prophecy" come true.
This includes wearing green tights and waking new recruits up in the middle of the night, then claiming to be Peter Pan and offering to take them to Neverland.

Sparkles are not "fairy dust" and throwing sparkles at people will not make them fly.
You may not ask the mages to make people fly after you throw sparkles at them.

[Solokov]

The admiral is not a system lord, I will treat him with respect due his station.
I am not, have not been, and will never be a member of the tok'Ra.

[Purple Wyrm]

The admiral is not a system lord, I will treat him with respect due his station.
I am not, have not been, and will never be a member of the tok'Ra.

I may not inform visiting Finns, Norwegians and Icelanders that they worship false gods.
I may not say "indeed" in a cryptic fashion.
I am not, and have never been a "first prime", no matter what I paint on my forehead.

[Solokov]

I may not inform visiting Finns, Norwegians and Icelanders that they worship false gods.
I may not say "indeed" in a cryptic fashion.
I am not, and have never been a "first prime", no matter what I paint on my forehead.

Replicators are not the greatest threat to face our planet.
The Rash is not a punishment visited upon us by the oori.
I am not a prophet of the oori just because I attached an open ended toilet seat and started speaking cryptically.
I am to henceforth surrender all materials in my possession pertaining to the pre-rash actor Richard Dean Anderson.

[urbicande]

Mikkel is no longer allowed to use his Galaxy Note to play Pokemon Go while in the Silent World.

[Ragnarok]

Mikkel is no longer allowed to use his Galaxy Note to play Pokemon Go while in the Silent World.

We don't know how you found that software, or how you managed to manufacture the devices for playing it, but we must ask that you stop distributing them among base personnel. Five people have walked into walls already, and at least two now think trolls are a rare breed of these 'Pokemon'.

[Tr]

"I was playing Pokémon Go" is not a valid excuse for breaking into your superior's office.

[VibratingText]

"I was playing Pokémon Go" is not a valid excuse for breaking into your superior's office.

"There was a Dragonite" is not a valid excuse for breaking into your superior's office.
"There was a Mewtwo", however, is, but not for Mikkel.

[OwlsG0]

"There was a Dragonite" is not a valid excuse for breaking into your superior's office.
"There was a Mewtwo", however, is, but not for Mikkel.

While on sentry duty, I must not tell the new recruit to 'cover for me' while I pursue a Pokemon. I may not claim that it was a 'shiny Pokemon' because my superiors will not believe they exist until they see one.

There was not a Jinx on top of the radio tower
There was not an Onyx in the admiral's private bathroom
There was not a Pikachu in the intensive care unit
There was not a Chancey in the feline units' barracks
There was not a Suicune in the stockrooms because Suicune isn't even in this generation

[Anna]

Rearranging barracks assignments by Pokémon team is not appropriate.
Neither is redecorating the barracks in team colors.

[JoB]

We don't know how you found that software, or how you managed to manufacture the devices for playing it, but we must ask that you stop distributing them among base personnel. Five people have walked into walls already, and at least two now think trolls are a rare breed of these 'Pokemon'.

I shall hand the servers over to the specialist team so that they can fix the presence of Pokémon

• generally away from areas that need to be protected from enemy forces
• in showers and toilets
• in the beds of my superiors