The SSSS Scriptorium

[Sunflower]

Had to try the Drabble-matic

This version is Most Best
The Adventure Of The Rash Beast


"You most best silly," Sigrun said, tickling Mikkel with her hose. "It's completely terrifying."

This is Sigrun on every date.

But Mikkel, although he was magnificent, knew he had to save his love. He grabbed a soap and, Like a farmer washing pigs, beat the rash beast calmly until it ran off. "That will teach you to run innocent people."

And this is Mikkel on every date.

Mikkel never loved again.

No wonder.  Nothing could top Sigrun tickling you with a hose.   

[LooNEY_DAC]

This part's "What We Already Know but Lalli Doesn't"
(But it's necessary story-wise)

“It’s a Wonderful Team”
Part 3

Spoiler: show

Puppy-Fox is showing Lalli what might have been if Emil had declined his uncle’s invitation and a different Cleanser, Eric, had taken his place. Eric has been deceptively pleasant to Tuuri while disdaining Lalli. Now, Puppy-Fox must show Lalli things about Emil of which Lalli was unaware...
“Erm, for this next bit, we need to go back to what was, rather than what would have been,” Puppy-Fox declared. “Got that?”
They were in the Felinopede, crawling slowly down the tunnel. Then-Lalli was fidgeting and moaning in his sleep atop the desk. Emil perched beside him, his face still bandaged.
The noises stopped. Now-Lalli saw that Emil had gently placed his hand to shield then-Lalli’s eyes from the weird green lights, until then-Lalli relaxed into true sleep. When the vehicle stopped with a soft kronk, Emil stealthily leapt away, ensuring then-Lalli wasn’t disturbed.
After yet another blur, they were in a hall in Ka-THUM Central, lit only by Emil’s lantern. After checking his chrono, Emil moved purposefully back the way he’d come, until--
SCRITCH SCRITCH SCRATCH
“Lal--” Emil began in a low voice, only for it to fade to a whispered, “--li?”
SCRITCH SCRITCH SCRATCH
A look of ‘I’m going to be sick, but I’m going to do this’ came over Emil’s face as he drew his knife. After only a few steps forward, though, a burst of gunk gouted down on him with a revolting SPLURK. Emil slowly looked up, as did now-Lalli, to see an almost-Giant clinging to the ceiling and ready to pounce. Troll ahead; troll below; this was probably where Adrenaline Girl came in.
Moving more swiftly than (now- or then-) Lalli would have expected, Emil dodged the plunging troll, swinging his lantern at where he obviously guessed the brains were. As the fallen troll let out a horrid screech, Emil flashed past the other troll, which still jumped out at him. Emil ducked and slashed out with his knife, cleanly slicing two of the troll’s four hands away, which let Emil gain some distance.
The troll slammed into Emil from behind. Emil managed to get his knife into its throat, but that didn’t slow its horribly snapping jaws, now just millimeters from Emil’s face. Emil screamed for Sigrun’s help, and got it. She sliced the troll’s jaws off and helped Emil up, urgency in her every move as she ordered him out.
Before leaving, though, Emil popped a flask open, emptying it in the hall. Then, as the almost-giant he’d wounded earlier bounded after them, Emil faced it down, pulling four small flare-things from his bandoleer and throwing them in a near-perfect pattern.
KA-THUM happened.
Sigrun and Emil hobbled into the street, coughing. Mikkel said something to them, and Emil--
Emil tried to bolt back into the building. Only then-Lalli’s defenstrous exit stopped him.
“Such surprise,” Puppy-Fox mocked, the world blurring...

So much for that.

[KMK]

This part's "What We Already Know but Lalli Doesn't"
(But it's necessary story-wise)

“It’s a Wonderful Team”
Part 3

Spoiler: show

Puppy-Fox is showing Lalli what might have been if Emil had declined his uncle’s invitation and a different Cleanser, Eric, had taken his place. Eric has been deceptively pleasant to Tuuri while disdaining Lalli. Now, Puppy-Fox must show Lalli things about Emil of which Lalli was unaware...
“Erm, for this next bit, we need to go back to what was, rather than what would have been,” Puppy-Fox declared. “Got that?”
They were in the Felinopede, crawling slowly down the tunnel. Then-Lalli was fidgeting and moaning in his sleep atop the desk. Emil perched beside him, his face still bandaged.
The noises stopped. Now-Lalli saw that Emil had gently placed his hand to shield then-Lalli’s eyes from the weird green lights, until then-Lalli relaxed into true sleep. When the vehicle stopped with a soft kronk, Emil stealthily leapt away, ensuring then-Lalli wasn’t disturbed.
After yet another blur, they were in a hall in Ka-THUM Central, lit only by Emil’s lantern. After checking his chrono, Emil moved purposefully back the way he’d come, until--
SCRITCH SCRITCH SCRATCH
“Lal--” Emil began in a low voice, only for it to fade to a whispered, “--li?”
SCRITCH SCRITCH SCRATCH
A look of ‘I’m going to be sick, but I’m going to do this’ came over Emil’s face as he drew his knife. After only a few steps forward, though, a burst of gunk gouted down on him with a revolting SPLURK. Emil slowly looked up, as did now-Lalli, to see an almost-Giant clinging to the ceiling and ready to pounce. Troll ahead; troll below; this was probably where Adrenaline Girl came in.
Moving more swiftly than (now- or then-) Lalli would have expected, Emil dodged the plunging troll, swinging his lantern at where he obviously guessed the brains were. As the fallen troll let out a horrid screech, Emil flashed past the other troll, which still jumped out at him. Emil ducked and slashed out with his knife, cleanly slicing two of the troll’s four hands away, which let Emil gain some distance.
The troll slammed into Emil from behind. Emil managed to get his knife into its throat, but that didn’t slow its horribly snapping jaws, now just millimeters from Emil’s face. Emil screamed for Sigrun’s help, and got it. She sliced the troll’s jaws off and helped Emil up, urgency in her every move as she ordered him out.
Before leaving, though, Emil popped a flask open, emptying it in the hall. Then, as the almost-giant he’d wounded earlier bounded after them, Emil faced it down, pulling four small flare-things from his bandoleer and throwing them in a near-perfect pattern.
KA-THUM happened.
Sigrun and Emil hobbled into the street, coughing. Mikkel said something to them, and Emil--
Emil tried to bolt back into the building. Only then-Lalli’s defenstrous exit stopped him.
“Such surprise,” Puppy-Fox mocked, the world blurring...

So much for that.

Go Looney! Go Looney!

[SeaAngel]

This part's "What We Already Know but Lalli Doesn't"
(But it's necessary story-wise)

I love this story!! Please do moooooorrrre!!
I want to see more of horrible Eric!! He really is the most horrible. I want to see more interactions! :B

...Why do I get the feeling PuppyFox is shipping LalliEmil...? XD

[LooNEY_DAC]

Horrible Eric gets worse.
(Wouldja believe it was the plan all along? It was.)

“It’s a Wonderful Team”
Part 4

Spoiler: show

Puppy-Fox resumes showing Lalli how Eric handles things differently than Emil...
“Now, we return to what would have been.” They were back in the tunnel, ‘Eric’ leaning through the doorway to chatter with the three in the cab. As they exited, ‘Eric’ accidentally-on-purpose knocked against then-Lalli’s legs, half-rousing him in time to catch ‘Eric’s’ nasty smirk before they piled out.
‘Eric’ tried to attach himself to either Sigrun or Tuuri, but when he saw the wrecked Danish behemoths half-buried in the bog, his eyes lit up. “Shouldn’t we try scrounging through those first?” he asked Sigrun. “Some of the stuff that’s left might be useful, and those metal coffins should be nest-free, since they tend to form icebergs in winter.”
As with Tuuri’s earlier plea, Sigrun considered it while Mikkel almost panicked at the thought. “Not just yet,” she decided. “In a few days, maybe; they’ll still be there, and we’ll have time to burn after we’ve loaded up with books.”
‘Eric’ was not happy, but he acquiesced.
“Blah blah blah,” Puppy-Fox mocked. “Onwards!”
They were in the hall where Emil had faced the trolls. ‘Eric’ was examining a lamp sconce to see if he could remove it without too much trouble as the Big Maw-Maw moved into place above him. A few seconds later, two limbless trolls lay before ‘Eric’, whose face got a hungry look on it.
“No, don’t cry out,” ‘Eric’ crooned softly, running his knife almost sensually down the larger troll’s blubbery flank.
“I can’t look,” Puppy-Fox announced, and time jumped ahead just a bit.
The bobbing light from Sigrun’s lamp could be seen as she tried to find ‘Eric’, so he did as Emil had, in almost the same way, but without a troll chasing him and without Sigrun next to him. “I hope you burn, bone-boy,” he growled before throwing the flare-things, and cried, “OUT, SIGRUN!”
‘Eric’ emerged from the building, asking in faux concern, “Sigrun? Lalli? Have either of them come out?” Then Sigrun emerged, coughing and limping. “You heard me yell to get out, didn’t you?”
Mikkel asked, “Where’s Lalli?”
‘Eric’ shrugged faux-helplessly, just before then-Lalli autodefenestrated.
Another blur brought them to the morning’s bath.
‘Eric’ wielded bucket and brush in such a way as to cause then-Lalli as much pain as possible. “Raggedy twig-pile,” ‘Eric’ growled as he plied the soap, “I wish this were lye!”
Eventually, the torture ceased. As soon as then-Lalli was in his sweater, ‘Eric’ shoved him at the Felinopede with a harshly growled, “Out of my sight, bone-heap!” Sigrun approached enthusiastically, but ‘Eric’ had his charming-but-fake smile back in place before she could see, so that it looked like ‘Eric’ had just sent then-Lalli off a little too heartily.
Even Puppy-Fox winced. “Ouch. But that leaves us about where we began, doesn’t it?” Lalli watched Puppy-Fox warily...

[KicknRun]

Horrible Eric gets worse.
(Wouldja believe it was the plan all along? It was.)

“It’s a Wonderful Team”
Part 4

Spoiler: show

Puppy-Fox resumes showing Lalli how Eric handles things differently than Emil...
“Now, we return to what would have been.” They were back in the tunnel, ‘Eric’ leaning through the doorway to chatter with the three in the cab. As they exited, ‘Eric’ accidentally-on-purpose knocked against then-Lalli’s legs, half-rousing him in time to catch ‘Eric’s’ nasty smirk before they piled out.
‘Eric’ tried to attach himself to either Sigrun or Tuuri, but when he saw the wrecked Danish behemoths half-buried in the bog, his eyes lit up. “Shouldn’t we try scrounging through those first?” he asked Sigrun. “Some of the stuff that’s left might be useful, and those metal coffins should be nest-free, since they tend to form icebergs in winter.”
As with Tuuri’s earlier plea, Sigrun considered it while Mikkel almost panicked at the thought. “Not just yet,” she decided. “In a few days, maybe; they’ll still be there, and we’ll have time to burn after we’ve loaded up with books.”
‘Eric’ was not happy, but he acquiesced.
“Blah blah blah,” Puppy-Fox mocked. “Onwards!”
They were in the hall where Emil had faced the trolls. ‘Eric’ was examining a lamp sconce to see if he could remove it without too much trouble as the Big Maw-Maw moved into place above him. A few seconds later, two limbless trolls lay before ‘Eric’, whose face got a hungry look on it.
“No, don’t cry out,” ‘Eric’ crooned softly, running his knife almost sensually down the larger troll’s blubbery flank.
“I can’t look,” Puppy-Fox announced, and time jumped ahead just a bit.
The bobbing light from Sigrun’s lamp could be seen as she tried to find ‘Eric’, so he did as Emil had, in almost the same way, but without a troll chasing him and without Sigrun next to him. “I hope you burn, bone-boy,” he growled before throwing the flare-things, and cried, “OUT, SIGRUN!”
‘Eric’ emerged from the building, asking in faux concern, “Sigrun? Lalli? Have either of them come out?” Then Sigrun emerged, coughing and limping. “You heard me yell to get out, didn’t you?”
Mikkel asked, “Where’s Lalli?”
‘Eric’ shrugged faux-helplessly, just before then-Lalli autodefenestrated.
Another blur brought them to the morning’s bath.
‘Eric’ wielded bucket and brush in such a way as to cause then-Lalli as much pain as possible. “Raggedy twig-pile,” ‘Eric’ growled as he plied the soap, “I wish this were lye!”
Eventually, the torture ceased. As soon as then-Lalli was in his sweater, ‘Eric’ shoved him at the Felinopede with a harshly growled, “Out of my sight, bone-heap!” Sigrun approached enthusiastically, but ‘Eric’ had his charming-but-fake smile back in place before she could see, so that it looked like ‘Eric’ had just sent then-Lalli off a little too heartily.
Even Puppy-Fox winced. “Ouch. But that leaves us about where we began, doesn’t it?” Lalli watched Puppy-Fox warily...

I want to punch Eric in the face. Very much.  Also, how are you updating so fast it takes me like a week to write 300 words.

[SolarPoweredGirl]

Here, have a short story I wrote:

When in hell...
No experience in his life had prepared Emil for his first visit to hell. Not that he believed in hell.

AGH this is so well written 
I love your title too
Is it supposed to be like the start of a sentence almost? Like When in Hell, Stand Still, Stay Silent (My most recent fan-fic is supposed to be hinting at a sentence- "Always Remember, Stand Still, Stay Silent.") ?

[LooNEY_DAC]

The last part, and an epilogue. I hope nobody's too disappointed.

“It’s a Wonderful Team”
Part 5

Spoiler: show

Puppy-Fox has shown Lalli what might have been if Emil had declined his uncle’s invitation and another Cleanser, Eric, had taken his place. Now caught up to when Puppy-Fox appeared, Puppy-Fox still has a few final words for Lalli...
“Of course, none of what I’ve shown you with Eric actually happened, and here’s why:” The scene blurred yet again. They stood in a rough camp cleared from a vast forest. Emil, hair suitably sparkly, was among a large crowd of similarly clad spectators surrounding a raised wooden platform upon which stood ‘Eric’, bound, and an impressive older man, scars crisscrossing his stern but kind face.
“CLEANSERS!” the man began at a volume just shy of the Shouty One’s. “You have been accepted into our family, regardless of anything in your past! This second chance--to show your true quality, without the weight of your past dragging you down--is not something to be taken lightly!” He turned to ‘Eric’. “Behold the consequences when that second chance, the trust we place in all of you to be as family to us and each other, is BETRAYED!”
A truly massive man cloaked in black stepped up behind ‘Eric’, unfurling a nasty-looking bullwhip.
“This one was accepted into our family as ‘Eric Smed’, and, had he honored that bond, he would have lived and died under that name, an honored member of our company. Instead, he tried to force himself on one of our fellows, violating the trust in which we all live, and, failing that, he killed her, against all that we hold dear!”
An angry murmur passed through the crowd.
“Now, as justice for this crime against every standard of Cleanser-hood, ‘Eric Smed’, or, as he will once again be known, Ivor Vit, will be flogged and used as TROLL-BAIT!” The cheers prevented him from continuing for some time. “Having broken the Cleanser-bond in the worst possible way, and having diminished us as a company, a nation, and as a whole, he will now serve to diminish our enemies!”
The noise of the crowd’s cheers cut off, leaving Lalli alone with Puppy-Fox.
“Not that you will believe this, but I was the one who heeded the murdered girl’s calls for justice by drawing the searchers to her body.” Puppy-Fox stared at now-Lalli intently. “So, are you finally properly grateful, human?”
Lalli nodded, unable to speak.
“OK. That’s all I wanted.” Puppy-Fox looked at him for a moment. “You know I’ll have to make you forget all this, right?”
Lalli nodded again.
“Well, I will leave the notion in your mind that it might have been all kinds of worse without Emil along, so you’ll keep some of that gratitude that we’re due.” They were back in the bunk area, Lalli lying on the nice wooden flats as he watched Puppy-Fox. “Farewell, Lalli Hotakainen. We may meet again, but not soon.”
Lalli slept...

“It’s a Wonderful Team”
Epilogue

Spoiler: show

Puppy-Fox has given Lalli his final words of remonstrance, wiped the young mage’s memory, and gone. His celestial fellows await his return...
Puppy-Fox wasn’t too surprised to see all the others assembled to greet his return from the mortal realm. They regarded him in silence for an almost unnervingly long time, but he kept his composure. Moose spoke then.
“You did well, Puppy-Fox.”
Puppy-Fox grinned at the surprise in Moose’s voice. “Well, it had to happen sometime,” he replied. “Don’t worry; I won’t make a habit of it.”
“Would that you did,” his mother said bleakly.
Bear spoke before Puppy-Fox could do more than flash her a hurt look from his impressive repertoire. “Moose and your mother are right, Puppy-Fox. Look at what you’ve accomplished with so little effort on your part, and imagine what good you might work if you actually tried.”
“That isn’t my style,” Puppy-Fox protested half-heartedly.
“Styles may change, as we grow older and more skilled,” Moose said.
“So what happens to the Hotakainens next?” Puppy-Fox asked in a transparent effort to end ‘the Intervention’.
“Soon, Lalli will meet with Onni and Reynir in the Otherworld, and what follows will be interesting indeed...”

And that's it.

Spoiler: The Complete Links • show

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5 & Epilogue

[Windfighter]

AGH this is so well written
I love your title too
Is it supposed to be like the start of a sentence almost? Like When in Hell, Stand Still, Stay Silent (My most recent fan-fic is supposed to be hinting at a sentence "Always Remember, Stand Still, Stay Silent.") ?

Thank you! And your explanation for the title sounds awesome so I'll just say that that was precisely what I intended.
In reality I just couldn't come up with anything

[Solovei]

Here, have a short story I wrote:

When in hell...
No experience in his life had prepared Emil for his first visit to hell. Not that he believed in hell.

^{come to AO3 dammit XD}
That was cute! also, is it by any chance from this prompt? If it is, you should send it in!

[Windfighter]

^{come to AO3 dammit XD}
That was cute! also, is it by any chance from this prompt? If it is, you should send it in!

Nope, hadn't seen that before, I don't do tumblr. The first sentence just started echoing in my head so I needed to write it down to get it out. Lalli wasn't even supposed to be there and then he just started throwing blankets at Emil and I couldn't just ignore him
Anyway, thanks

I'll come to AO3 when you come to ff.net!

[Solovei]

I'll come to AO3 when you come to ff.net!

Never, AO3 is just too good.

[zetkaj]

....I want to thank all the people who had written anything for SSSS. Because every single thing is amazing. How is that even possible. (Reading the whole thread was absolutely worthwhile)

The last part, and an epilogue. I hope nobody's too disappointed.

“It’s a Wonderful Team”
Part 5

Spoiler: show

Puppy-Fox has shown Lalli what might have been if Emil had declined his uncle’s invitation and another Cleanser, Eric, had taken his place. Now caught up to when Puppy-Fox appeared, Puppy-Fox still has a few final words for Lalli...
“Of course, none of what I’ve shown you with Eric actually happened, and here’s why:” The scene blurred yet again. They stood in a rough camp cleared from a vast forest. Emil, hair suitably sparkly, was among a large crowd of similarly clad spectators surrounding a raised wooden platform upon which stood ‘Eric’, bound, and an impressive older man, scars crisscrossing his stern but kind face.
“CLEANSERS!” the man began at a volume just shy of the Shouty One’s. “You have been accepted into our family, regardless of anything in your past! This second chance--to show your true quality, without the weight of your past dragging you down--is not something to be taken lightly!” He turned to ‘Eric’. “Behold the consequences when that second chance, the trust we place in all of you to be as family to us and each other, is BETRAYED!”
A truly massive man cloaked in black stepped up behind ‘Eric’, unfurling a nasty-looking bullwhip.
“This one was accepted into our family as ‘Eric Smed’, and, had he honored that bond, he would have lived and died under that name, an honored member of our company. Instead, he tried to force himself on one of our fellows, violating the trust in which we all live, and, failing that, he killed her, against all that we hold dear!”
An angry murmur passed through the crowd.
“Now, as justice for this crime against every standard of Cleanser-hood, ‘Eric Smed’, or, as he will once again be known, Ivor Vit, will be flogged and used as TROLL-BAIT!” The cheers prevented him from continuing for some time. “Having broken the Cleanser-bond in the worst possible way, and having diminished us as a company, a nation, and as a whole, he will now serve to diminish our enemies!”
The noise of the crowd’s cheers cut off, leaving Lalli alone with Puppy-Fox.
“Not that you will believe this, but I was the one who heeded the murdered girl’s calls for justice by drawing the searchers to her body.” Puppy-Fox stared at now-Lalli intently. “So, are you finally properly grateful, human?”
Lalli nodded, unable to speak.
“OK. That’s all I wanted.” Puppy-Fox looked at him for a moment. “You know I’ll have to make you forget all this, right?”
Lalli nodded again.
“Well, I will leave the notion in your mind that it might have been all kinds of worse without Emil along, so you’ll keep some of that gratitude that we’re due.” They were back in the bunk area, Lalli lying on the nice wooden flats as he watched Puppy-Fox. “Farewell, Lalli Hotakainen. We may meet again, but not soon.”
Lalli slept...

“It’s a Wonderful Team”
Epilogue

Spoiler: show

Puppy-Fox has given Lalli his final words of remonstrance, wiped the young mage’s memory, and gone. His celestial fellows await his return...
Puppy-Fox wasn’t too surprised to see all the others assembled to greet his return from the mortal realm. They regarded him in silence for an almost unnervingly long time, but he kept his composure. Moose spoke then.
“You did well, Puppy-Fox.”
Puppy-Fox grinned at the surprise in Moose’s voice. “Well, it had to happen sometime,” he replied. “Don’t worry; I won’t make a habit of it.”
“Would that you did,” his mother said bleakly.
Bear spoke before Puppy-Fox could do more than flash her a hurt look from his impressive repertoire. “Moose and your mother are right, Puppy-Fox. Look at what you’ve accomplished with so little effort on your part, and imagine what good you might work if you actually tried.”
“That isn’t my style,” Puppy-Fox protested half-heartedly.
“Styles may change, as we grow older and more skilled,” Moose said.
“So what happens to the Hotakainens next?” Puppy-Fox asked in a transparent effort to end ‘the Intervention’.
“Soon, Lalli will meet with Onni and Reynir in the Otherworld, and what follows will be interesting indeed...”

And that's it.

Why would anybody be disappointed, it was great! And I wanted to punch Eric too.

Here, have a short story I wrote:

When in hell...
No experience in his life had prepared Emil for his first visit to hell. Not that he believed in hell.

Too adorable
also, I agree with the 'come to ao3' thing, ffnet gave me trojans once

[LooNEY_DAC]

By request, I put "It's a Wonderful Team" on my deviantArt. Here's the link to Part 1: http://looney-dac.deviantart.com/art/Stand-Still-Stay-Silent-It-s-a-Wonderful-Team-1-534148474

[KicknRun]

Count on a Hand

The city is no longer a city. It holds monsters, by all the names you can call abominations, and the city is no longer a city, it is a home. A home to monsters, so not quite the best home. The monsters were once (or many) human. But the Old World is destroyed in defilement, and the New World is not quite as clean as one would hope.

The old world is silent. Then the humans come back. It is armies that do not know they are simply there to die. The sound of death is loud. The old world is silent.

Then the humans come back. Its not many, five who become six, and it is (hopefully) enough.

The girl who is not and will never be safe, the one who will tell the tale (if) when they come back. The boy who sees spirits and sees ruin. The boy who is too young to hold fire in his hands. The child who shouldn't be here at all. There is a woman who slices trolls and smiles after and a man who knows how to heal and what was here before. (Its a terrible sort of knowledge)

The boy with the fire and the woman with the smile go, to loot and discover,and something awakens.

A/N: Unfinished multi chapter fanfictions? I have no idea what you are talking about. This was going to be a little bit longer, but the part i wanted didn't really fit in with anything else but so help me god i'll put in some other fanfic. I was trying out a more old-timey style or writing, and this came out.(it took like 40 min to put in down on paper jeez)