It is not an instinctive reaction, I agree. Which is why it's so interesting that he does it... he extrapolated that Emil cares about the state of hair from way back when Emil smoothed Lalli's hair down. I think he really was doing what he thought was appropriate in the situation, which is indicative of normal empathy levels
Yes, Lalli thought it to be appropriate--and that's the thing: an
empathic reaction would have required a deeper, linked-to-the-situation
understanding where Emil's distress is coming from (namely, his troll experience a few minutes ago) AND to
understand what's likely to make the person feel better in the situation (=appropriate). To NOT understand this very obvious connection is a sign that Lalli's not really well versed in theory of mind (elaborately theorizing what's going on in other people's heads and basing your own reactions on that--a thing neurotypicals do on an automatic level, whereas people on the autistic spectrum CAN learn it, but it seems to remain a laborous thing to do, see for example descriptions by Tempel Grandin on the matter).
However, lacking that understanding doesn't make him indifferent to Emil's distress. Uta Frith describes this as "instinctive sympathy": perceiving a person to be sad=>do something to cheer them up, regardless whether this is an appropriate thing to do given the situation/the reason they are sad. So yes, Lalli remembered that Emil cares a lot about his hair, but he wrongly assumed fixing it would brighten Emil's mood due to poor theory of mind.
(and yes, although people on the spectrum have more or less difficulties with perceiving emotional states of others, they CAN decipher at least some or intense ones--also, they seemingly tend to get better with that when growing older and more experienced with how neurotypicals express themselves)
The allowing himself to be manhandled is very much a personality thing too
Granded. However, these things in isolation are not what I base my argumentation upon, I base it upon the fact that Lalli seemingly doesn't get how people "work", and all the other examples of unusual behavior I named just fit in the picture of him not being neurotypical imo.
As far as the stealing food goes, I think that may be a survival tactic. [...] If rationing was ever a thing, Lalli (going through his ravenous teenage years) would have totally gotten used to stealing food. Also remember that when people don't get enough sleep they need more food, and simultaneously have less energy to go through the 'proper' method of obtaining more of it. (In Lalli's case, getting his cousin, asking her to translate (risking the possibility that she might scold him for being greedy and refuse) and then relying on Mikkel to give him maybe one more cookie instead of just taking the initiative, so to speak, with a close to 100% chance of ending up with all of the cookies)
See, the thought processes you just described: it feels to me like Lalli wouldn't have them. He just takes the food because he's hungry. He doesn't think about asking because who holds ownership over the food isn't part of his thought process, nor does he think for a second about how the others may feel about his thievery. Which is either rude and antisocial, or, and I think that's the case, people getting upset by his actions is simply not part of his way of thinking. Same with things like politeness--it doesn't seem to me as if he disregards these things out of deliberate rudeness or as a calculated way to make things easier for him.
Which doesn't mean he couldn't learn to read people better or to be polite, mind you.
Tuuri's and Lalli's dynamic reminds me a lot of me with my neurotypical, but extremely introverted, cousin. [...] Our conversations mainly consist of half-finished sentences, interruptions, vague references, and the odd quotation. I suspect that this is also what's going on when Lalli's doing the debriefing..."This is weird, that felt funny...." familiarity doesn't always mean chattiness, sometimes quite the opposite.
Absolutely!
But the question is: if you'd show your cousin the comic and tell him that Emil really cares about his hair and then show your cousin what happened to Emil on the train and THEN ask him why Emil's distressed and what's likely to make him feel better in the situation--would he think tidying up Emil's hair would do the job?
Again, as far as the theory of Lalli's being on the spectrum goes, I can only say that somebody who was inclined to sensory overload and/or had trouble prioritizing details would be an extremely poor scout.
Not everyone on the autistic spectrum has sensory overload issues. Also, sensory overload issues seem to come in many different forms (for example: loud explosions all around aren't a bother, but the feeling of the clothes one wears drive one crazy, or the sound a specific pen makes on paper).
Concerning the eye for details instead of the bigger picture: on the contrary, I'd think being able to notice tiny differences in your environment would HELP you in your scouting and alert you of danger way ahead of your collegues!
It's not just introversion, sleep-deprivation, and cultural differences: it's all three of those put together.
Ooor it could be his personality, which strikes me as a personality of someone who's likely on the spectrum.
I guess time (and Minna) will tell!
And WELCOME TO THE FORUM!!! get out now while you still can :p
THANK YOU!!! =] (also thanks for the good advice, but I think it's too late for that already /o\)