Covid 19 - How we survived the Rash!

[thorny]

Now there is a phrase I haven’t heard in awhile - ‘le cafard’.

Hey, I have learned a new word!

This is good.

[Yastreb]

Le cafard (literally "the cockroach") is said to have been coined by Charles Baudelaire in 1857 as a synonym for depression, and came to him as he wrote Les Fleurs du Mal. Other writers have credited the French Foreign Legion with the being the source; le cafard was their slang for the moods brought on by the mind-numbing tedium of barracks and outpost life.

[Róisín]

I know Baudelaire used it, but tend to credit the Foreign Legion for its origin.

[Vulpes]

I'm not sure where else to put this, so here it is - it's silliness like this that gets me through, anyway. Back in the middle of the month, shortly after John Prine died, I was staring at the fright wig that is my hair (I needed a haircut already at the start of the health state of emergency) and thinking, "I have pandemic hair." Then it struck me that "pandemic hair" has the same rhythm as "illegal smile". A few song lines drifted through my head, but that was that - I was in the midst of finishing the semester remotely and had no extra mental energy. But today I submitted my final grades at last, and unburdened by those concerns, my brain returned to the idea of pandemic hair, and this happened. With the greatest respect and affection for John Prine and his wonderful Illegal Smile (https://youtu.be/MmjnQjRvPUQ), I give you Pandemic Hair (spoiler removed because a moderator said I could - thanks wave):

When I woke up this morning, I was feelin' down
Seemed like COVID-19 shuttered everything in town
Got the toaster out to make some toast - no bread
Need to go buy more but would rather watch Netflix instead
Ah unfortunately, I have to feed my quarantined family

So you may see me someplace
With my pandemic hair
It's in such a mess
I don't care what I wear
So I'm wearin' my sweats
Like I'm out for a run
But I'm just gettin' groceries done

Last time I checked my pantry, it was lookin' bare
Sometimes it seems like tins of beans are all I have in there
I stood in line for hours tryin' to buy some milk - no dice
Someone nearby without a mask sneezed t'wards me, not nice
Ah, unfortunately, I have to feed my quarantined family

So you may see me someplace
With my pandemic hair
It's in such a mess
I don't care what I wear
So I'm wearin' my sweats
Like I'm out for a run
But I'm just gettin' groceries done

Well I sat down in my closet with my toilet paper hoard
Tryin' to get away from all the squabblin' 'cause we're bored
I dreamed the lockdown was called off and I thought, what now?
Then the second wave arrived to knock us down - kerpow!
Ah, unfortunately, I have to feed my quarantined family

So you may see me someplace
With my pandemic hair
It's in such a mess
I don't care what I wear
So I'm wearin' my sweats
Like I'm out for a run
But I'm just gettin' groceries done


(Minor edit - as I drifted off to sleep I realised it should be "someplace" not "somewhere" in the chorus.)

[Róisín]

Brilliant! And John Prine is good.

[wavewright62]

Aww, excellent song, and I would definitely take off the spoilers and fly it proud! 
Also, my hair also needed cutting before the lockdown, but fortunately it grows verrry slowly, and it is currently only unkempt.  It may proceed to pandemic hair before this is over.

[Jitter]

My hair is way longer than I prefer, but in terms of length and form it’s mostly ok. But the color is starting to look funny, the dark pink highlights and nice dark color are moving farther and farther along, and the natural dull gray with some greys doesn’t really match it too well The only real form problem is that the hair above the ears is now the sticking out length, but that gets covered by headphones so only my family gets to enjoy it.

I was also planning to go to hairdressers just as this came along but no luck. We have a home barber set at home which hubby cut the boys’ hair with when they were young enough to agree. So, if push comes to shove...

[Róisín]

I must say I envy those of you whose hair grows too fast! Mine grows incredibly slowly, (I’m old, though it grew somewhat slowly even when I was young), which annoys me because I actually prefer it long. If I am doing anything where it could get in the way I can simply braid it up, and long hair looks better on me than short. I have had it short a few times, the last few occasions being after head injuries which some or all of it needed to be shaved to treat, and it looks dreadful. I have a square sort of face, and without long hair to soften the edges I look far too much like my brothers for my comfort. And mine is nearly all white now, though still has a few reddish streaks in it.

I suppose there is still the Onni school of haircuts. Onnenlintu, in one of his delightful long stories, has a chapter with Emil giving Lalli a haircut, and asks Lalli who normally cuts his hair. Lalli replies that Onni does, and Emil remarks that Onni’s own hair looks as though he cuts it with a fishing knife and no mirror, leaving Lalli wondering how Emil came to that very accurate answer. I laughed so hard at that....

[RanVor]

Heh. Fortunately, my hair is designed to require as little maintenance as possible. The perks of being chronically lazy, I guess.

[Keep Looking]

When I was younger my parents would cut my hair (there was one period when I was about 3 or 4 years old when I had a bowlcut). My mother would always keep it above my shoulders (motivated by her dislike of cleaning long hairs off the bathroom floor). My dad still cuts my little brother's hair, actually - just a simple buzzcut every few months.

When I first got charge of my own hair, I tried growing it out to see what it'd be like, but I got to about mid-back and then it started being annoying. These days I generally keep it just below shoulder length - long enough so I can tie it out of the way, but not so long that it drags in everything. I suppose that's a benefit during these times - a few more inches on shoulder-length hair doesn't do much, but a few more inches on short hair can turn it from smart into scruffy.

My older brother is definitely the worst culprit for getting 'pandemic hair' - he always puts off getting his hair cut (too much effort!), and since his hair is brown/black and wavy like mine if he leaves it for too long the sides of his head start puffing out with little curls and he looks very stupid. I have to say, it's put me off cutting my hair really short - that and I'm in the same boat as Roisin - my older brother and I already look very similar and I don't think I want to increase that.

[Jitter]

Mine also goes on to make "clown haircut" in summer when it dries, if I leave it uncut for too long. I.e. curls directly outwards on the sides Otherwise it's just very slightly wavy, but of course the curls appear in the most stupid spot I had cancer a few years ago and lost all my hair, so I know I don't look terrible even in very short hair. BUT, the first time my dad saw a picture of me after the remaining wisps were shaved off (with the selfsame home barber thingy already mentioned) the thought it was my brother (who has shaved all his hair for many years). So, if I have to go that route i will ask for the longest available setting on the thingy, which is something like 15 mm.

My boys tend to go a lot towards Onni before they can manage to get around to reminding me to book barber for them (they are big enough so I tell them that I will book it and give them money to go, but they have to remind me at some time when I can do it, i.e. not the minute we are going to sleep, which they usually do). They had a somewhat similar "road colored" blonde color too earlier, but now are darker than the Hotakainens.

[JoB]

Also, my hair also needed cutting before the lockdown

Same here, which means that the tips are starting to get into my face and "inside" my glasses now (which tends to give me a headache). Luckily, I have a beard trimmer and know from my (sparse) hairdresser experiences that an all-around 12mm machine trim looks somewhat OK-ish on me. So, I'll wait just a bit longer and see how it goes with the announced reopening of hairdressers' "with extra precautions" in early May ...

The other other option is, of course, to grab the bunch of rubber bands from the kitchen and go for an actual coronavirus hairstyle ... :

[Vulpes]

Same here, which means that the tips are starting to get into my face and "inside" my glasses now (which tends to give me a headache). Luckily, I have a beard trimmer and know from my (sparse) hairdresser experiences that an all-around 12mm machine trim looks somewhat OK-ish on me. So, I'll wait just a bit longer and see how it goes with the announced reopening of hairdressers' "with extra precautions" in early May ...

The other other option is, of course, to grab the bunch of rubber bands from the kitchen and go for an actual coronavirus hairstyle ... :

I like that idea... except that I know from very painful experience that plain old rubber bands get really firmly stuck in my hair and are well-nigh impossible to get out, except by cutting. Wouldn't that leave an attractive mess!

I have really thick hair - well, the hair itself is normal but there seems to be so much of it - so they always thin out the underside around the back. That has bulked up, so whatever's on top sticks out, and I look increasingly like a mushroom. And it can now reach my cheeks and nose and tickle horribly, unless I find creative (and slightly odd-looking) ways to keep it contained. Not that I'm complaining after a long winter, but it's getting too warm to wear a toque all the time! Also I'm a bit beyond the age group that wears toques indoors and out, year round.

[Vulpes]

[...]
I suppose there is still the Onni school of haircuts. Onnenlintu, in one of his delightful long stories, has a chapter with Emil giving Lalli a haircut, and asks Lalli who normally cuts his hair. Lalli replies that Onni does, and Emil remarks that Onni’s own hair looks as though he cuts it with a fishing knife and no mirror, leaving Lalli wondering how Emil came to that very accurate answer. I laughed so hard at that....

I'll have to go find that one! It reminds me of a prof when I was in grad school, he was a classic biology prof - wore socks with Teva sandles year 'round, baggy ill-fitting corduroys, and had a collection of ancient sweaters, all of which were ravelling at the elbows and cuffs. And he had very thick, unruly hair. One day he came into class and his hair looked even odder than usual - there seemed to be big chunks missing, and tufts were sticking up at odd angles. I said softly to the person next to me, "I think his wife must've cut his hair... with hedge shears." At which she burst into very loud laughter - I was terrified he'd ask what we were laughing about, because we all respected and liked him very much. But dammit, it did look like it was cut with hedge shears!

[Róisín]

Sounds like one of the musician cousins (who is sorely missed). Tall, skinny Islesman wearing old ratty jumpers, sandals and fraying corduroys, or his kilt for high formal occasions, red beard long enough to put in several braids if he was being fancy, cloud of fine thin red hair which he would only ever hack back if it started getting under his glasses, and usually an accordion, concertina, fiddle, mandolin or set of pipes occupying his hands. He looked like a professor, and was a brilliant composer and one those people who can meet a musical instrument they have never heard of before and be playing it well enough for listeners to enjoy in a couple of hours, and to stage standard in a couple of weeks. ‘Scruffy genius’ seems to be a type.