Bad jokes thread

[Yastreb]

There's the proposed prequel to Pirates of the Carribean...it's Fred Sparrow.
And the tragic story of a shocking accident in the gym... Runaway Strain.
It's just not cricket... when it's Batsman versus Superman.
There's darkly humorous superhero action in... Irony Man.
Plus soft porn meets sword-and-sorcery in... The Breastmaster.

[Opaque]

Hahaha! The Breastmaster! I'm mad at myself for not thinking of that one.

Some more
The Wreath of Khan
Dogman
School of Rocks
Acne Ventura Pet Detective

[Yastreb]

Bureaucracy gone mad! Whales need permits to eat? It's... Licence to Krill.
Has this Irish lass come back with a bad attitude? It's... A Bridget Too Far.
These First Nation folk just don't care... The Least of the Mohicans.

[Opaque]

Hot fuzzy - Soft Furry porn
The Wring - The dramatic story a towel that takes on too much water
For Goodness Snake - The story of a kind reptile
Beef Movie - Like Bee movie but with cows

[Yastreb]

The romance of sailing; it's About A Buoy
He couldn't bear to give up sweets... Diet Another Day
It's the vicar's final dance in Last Tango In Parish

[Opaque]

Wolverine is losing his hair. How will he stop this? - X - Men The Last Strand
A romantic comedy about a girl who likes to sleep around - Catch Men if You Can
Will this boy succeed in overcoming his bowel issues using martial arts? - The Karate Skid
Our sun has uncomfortable growths on it. Oh no! - Star Warts

[Jitter]

Apocalypse How - zombie, climate, pandemic, AI, alien invasion? Who knows!?
The Modfather - the mod of all mods will moderate everything
Some like it not - not into romance Yoda is
Forgo - just leave it
Aging bull - Jake is getting old and frail
Ouch of Evil - even evil hurts when dropping book on toe
A*S*H - the field hospital burns down. End of story.
Near window - a man breaks his leg and is bored as he can't reach his window from his chair
Raiders of the Lost Park - Rookie cleansers train near Mora
Close encounters of the third kid - How come every time you turn a corner, there he is again?
The mold rush - when everything went bad
Mad Max: Fur Road - the bad guy is hoarding expensive furs! shame on him!

[Jitter]

The question Apocalypse How? is answered in the sequel, Apocalyse Cow! It's monsters!

[Yastreb]

A romantic comedy about a girl who likes to sleep around - Catch Men if You Can

There's the sequel, where she has occasional bouts of fidelity; Stand By Men
A tragedy about laryngitis... The Hoarse Whisperer
Disasters don't happen in Yorkshire, in... Apocalypse Nowt.

[Opaque]

The retired chief magistrate from Venice settles down in a small cozy town - Dogevill
A membership club for all the Chad's in the area - Chaddyshack
There's a seal in the way! How can we move him? - Beyond the Seal
Two competing companies are constantly trying to outdo the other - Rate Race

[Yastreb]

The rulers of Venice ain't playing nice any longer... The Doges Of War
They're shipping after sunset in... Freight Night
This town can turn you on and turn you off. Find out how in The Switches Of Eastwick
It's Monarch versus Killer Clown in The King And It
He's a veteran fisherman. She can balance a beach ball on her nose. They're in love. It's The Old Man And The Seal.

[Opaque]

An artist travels the world seeking new and interesting scenarios - Sisterhood of the Traveling Paints
A horror story of the worst uric acid build up in medical history - Inside Gout
The famous ancient writer seeks solitude to continue his work - Homer Alone
A mysterious illness is attacking the adrenal glands of an elderly man. The doctors find out the man is much much older than they thought -The Gland Before Time

Ugh, I think I'm running out of  ideas.

[Jitter]

The entirely autofictional pinnacle of authorial self-centredness - The Ego Movie
The kitten lies in its hiding place, waiting for the unsuspecting victim! - Paws

[thegreyarea]

Mysterious bread walks the house at night - Night of The Living Bread

Pie maker just wants do bake freely - Live and Let Pie

The search for a very special vegetable - The Hunt for Red Cocumber

[thegreyarea]

A fan stalks an author but never shows up - The Invisible Fan

Pun maker with a master work is ready to take over the world - The Man With The Golden Pun

Baker fails to make the promised pie but won't give up - Pie Another Day

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A stack of car engines accidentaly drops over the thieves that were trying to steal them - Mortal Engines

Los Angeles 2022. The central system has a bug and sets all traffic lights to red on rush hour - Streets of Rage

Guy finds a hounted clam on his plate - Ghost In The Shell

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In a frezzing New York she must find a way to survive until the end of the month - The Pay After Tomorrow

A frog and his son struggle to survive on a devastated land - The Toad

Somewhere in the middle of Australia a machine keeps dialing all numbers in the list - Mad Fax

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Centuries after a mysterious outbreak revives old cassettes as sentient beings they now rule the world - Planet of the Tapes

Strange events left the planet empty. Humanity lone survivor crosses the wasteland with his dog searching for autographs - The Last Fan on Earth