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Author Topic: Bad jokes thread  (Read 139386 times)

Double H

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #195 on: August 12, 2016, 04:51:07 PM »
Quote from: urbicande on August 12, 2016, 04:23:37 PM
There was a statistician who stood with one food in a bucket of ice water and one foot in a bucket of very hot water and said "On the average, I feel fine!"

https://youtu.be/oJ3REJYFuv8?t=32s
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OwlsG0

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #196 on: August 12, 2016, 10:01:10 PM »
Why did the chicken cross the Mobius Strip?

To get to the same side


(A cousin of mine has the Mobius tattooed on and have literally spent full hours trying to work out where it stops)
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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #197 on: August 13, 2016, 07:36:43 AM »
Quote from: Iceea on August 12, 2016, 03:28:35 PM
From the pages of Boy's Life, many years ago:
Do you think there's intelligent life on Mars?
I sure do.
Why is that?
Well, you don't see them spending hundreds of millions of dollars to get here do you?

To counter that:
I don't know why people think we're going to find intelligent life on Mars. We've been on earth all this time and have still seen no sign of intelligence
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OwlsG0

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #198 on: August 13, 2016, 08:57:34 PM »
The mathematical symbols pi and 'i' meet at a party and get into a relationship. They stay together for a long time, but strains start to show in the relationship. After a long time 'i' and pi have a huge blow-out fight.

As pi leaves the house, 'i' shouts "I wish you'd be rational!"

And pi shouts back "Get real!"

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Lazy8

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #199 on: August 13, 2016, 08:58:31 PM »
Quote from: OwlsG0 on August 13, 2016, 08:57:34 PM
The mathematical symbols pi and 'i' meet at a party and get into a relationship. They stay together for a long time, but strains start to show in the relationship. After a long time 'i' and pi have a huge blow-out fight.

As pi leaves the house, 'i' shouts "I wish you'd be rational!"

And pi shouts back "Get real!"

But... but... I already told that one...
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Buteo

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #200 on: August 13, 2016, 09:21:39 PM »
OwlsGo and Lazy8, I thank you and my mathematician husband thanks you. He needs a bit of cheering up these days, and hadn't heard that one for several years; he is pleased that it is still around.  ;)
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OwlsG0

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #201 on: August 13, 2016, 09:41:33 PM »
Quote from: Lazy8 on August 13, 2016, 08:58:31 PM
But... but... I already told that one...

Oh, crap, sorry dude! I must have re-discovered it then because I thought it was the first time I read it. Whoops! First credit for the joke to Lazy8
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JoB

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #202 on: August 14, 2016, 12:04:55 PM »
Quote from: Double H on August 12, 2016, 11:37:10 AM
Please someone post more math jokes I'm loving these.  ;D
Eeeehh, don't count on it. Unless math is integral to their work, people tend to minimize its presence in their lives to tangents.

"You have dialled an imaginary number. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again."
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Lazy8

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #203 on: August 14, 2016, 12:37:24 PM »
Quote from: JoB on August 14, 2016, 12:04:55 PM
Eeeehh, don't count on it. Unless math is integral to their work, people tend to minimize its presence in their lives to tangents.

*facepalm*
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urbicande

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #204 on: August 14, 2016, 08:53:20 PM »
Quote from: JoB on August 14, 2016, 12:04:55 PM
Eeeehh, don't count on it. Unless math is integral to their work, people tend to minimize its presence in their lives to tangents.

"You have dialled an imaginary number. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again."

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Anna

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #205 on: August 22, 2016, 07:32:07 PM »
What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?
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Juniper

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #206 on: August 22, 2016, 07:42:15 PM »
Spotted on tumblr today:

If a Norwegian robot analyzes a bird, it Scandinavian.
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OwlsG0

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #207 on: August 24, 2016, 12:00:00 AM »
Quote from: Juniper on August 22, 2016, 07:42:15 PM
Spotted on tumblr today:

If a Norwegian robot analyzes a bird, it Scandinavian.

muted screaming
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Athena

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #208 on: August 24, 2016, 01:19:00 AM »
Quote from: Anna on August 22, 2016, 07:32:07 PM
What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

*sigh...* ok. You win. That's pretty good. :V

Quote from: Juniper on August 22, 2016, 07:42:15 PM
Spotted on tumblr today:

If a Norwegian robot analyzes a bird, it Scandinavian.

I just got this and wow. :))
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urbicande

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Re: Bad jokes thread
« Reply #209 on: August 24, 2016, 09:32:24 AM »
Quote from: Juniper on August 22, 2016, 07:42:15 PM
Spotted on tumblr today:

If a Norwegian robot analyzes a bird, it Scandinavian.

Love it!

Why do ducks have flat feet?

To stamp out forest fires!

Why do elephants have flat feet?

To stamp out burning ducks!
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