I couldn’t find a ‘weird stuff I saw today’ thread, so I’m just going to post it here.
This morning I thought I saw Death riding shotgun in a milk float.
That’s a sentence that requires some elaboration, so here goes: I was walking down from my house to the university campus this morning at about half seven/eight o’clock. The walk takes me over a humpback bridge, and as I was coming over the top I saw a milk float coming up the road towards me. Nothing odd about that, except I notice there’s someone in the passenger seat. Now that is odd – milkmen almost always drive around on their own (why would you even need two milkmen?). So I have a passing glance at this person in the passenger seat, my mind mostly on other things, and for a second I’m convinced it’s Death.
Whoever it is has got a paper-white stony face set in an utterly impassive gaze and is wearing a hooded black robe. They’re looking straight ahead, not moving a muscle. Of course, I quickly come to the conclusion that it’s not actually Death himself, but someone dressed up as him. This begs the obvious question of why are they riding shotgun in a milk float but hey, I’m not one to judge.
Except when the milk float draws nearer I see it’s not actually a person at all. The milkman, for reasons known only to himself, has tied a blank white Venetian-carnival-style mask to the headrest of the passenger seat. This, coupled with the black outline of the seat, was what I had thought was a hooded figure from further away. I walked the rest of the way to campus in a state halfway between confusion and hysterical laughter.
Tl;dr: come to England! Even our milkmen are frickin’ weird!