Poetry collection

[IKEA]

A collection of haikus:
Our dear Captain Sig
Kills trolls, punches crap buildings
The most best leader.

Tall Mister Madsen
Who here needs medical help?
Face cancer is real.

Arrogant Emil
Has flamethrower, will travel
Don't touch the sparkles!

(I can't think of any for the others at the moment).

[corncobman]

Pg 477

Kneeling, Appealing, Terrified Feeling

The shadows unfolding,
From a multi-limbed mass,
Disgusting to behold,
In mortal plane trespass.

A runic bubbling spell,
Around the pleading mage.
This glowing light shell,
Against the black evil's rage.

In this desperate stand,
Will he mage status earn?
Against all odds the misfit.
And his dog growling in turn.

----------------------------------

Wizard In A Bubble
(based on Message In A Bottle by the Police)

Just a foot away
A shadow in my face, oh
A horror-filled display
On the ceiling space, oh
More in this place
Than any man could bear
Rescue me before I fall into despair, oh

Just keep this frightful mess from us all
Just keep this frightful mess from us all
I pray that I will not die
I pray that I will not die
I pray that I will not die
Wizard in a bubble
Wizard in a bubble

I'm on my knees since there is no hope
But I should have known this right from the start
Only a visit from the nether
Here to take our lives
And tear out all our hearts

Just keep this frightful mess from us all
Just keep this frightful mess from us all
I pray that I will not die
I pray that I will not die
I pray that I will not die
Wizard in a bottle
Wizard in a bottle
Oh, wizard in a bubble
Wizard in a bubble

Horrible creature
It's making my skin crawl
A scary nightmare shadow
Creeping down the walls
Now it wants to swallow me whole
A multi-legged nightmare-thing
Looking for a soul

Just keep this frightful mess from us all
Just keep this frightful mess from us all
I pray that I will not die
I pray that I will not die
I pray that I will not die
Wizard in a bubble
Wizard in a bubble
Wizard in a bubble
Wizard in a bubble

Go away, you big black mess
Go away, you big black mess
Go away, you big black mess
Go away, you big black mess...

[corncobman]

Pg 478

Go Away, Don't Want It
(Any Way You Want It by Journey)

Go away, don't want it
Get away, don't need it
Go away, don't want it

It's coming welp,
I need some help
From this horror-thing
Come save us please
I'm on my knees
I hate everything

Ooh, can't fight, this wight
Oh, what a fright
So hold tight, tonight
Ooh, doggy, hold tight

Oh, I said go away, don't want it
Get away, don't need it
Go away, don't want it
I said go away, don't want it
Get away, don't need it
Go away, don't want it

I'm very screwed
I have no clue
What a mage can do
Ooh, I'm so numb
Save us from
The shadow, here it comes

Ooh, can't fight, this wight
Oh, what a fright
So hold tight, tonight
Ooh doggy, hold tight

Oh, I said go away, don't want it
Get away, don't need it
Go away, don't want it
I said go away, don't want it
Get away don't need it
Go away don't want it

[corncobman]

Pg 479

Prayer In Woe, Tear At the Shadow

In between realities,
In dream and nightmare,
Intense, in agony,
Invader, soon laid bare.

Reynir hugs his friend,
Hope, seems he lost it.
Lalli at a worse end
Already been exhausted.

Onni's owl but swoops,
Its claws out stretched,
The shadow itself scooped,
Tearing at the wretched.

Wings fanned, piercing eyes,
Glaring at the phantom.
Majestic and wise,
Full of wrath but yet calm.

In a different class,
Magnificent in flight
Into the shadowy mass,
Bringing forth the light.

[corncobman]

Pg 480

Terror Begone, By The Light Shone.

The owl rises,
Black arms reaching.
Slash surprises,
For blood leeching.

The owl speaks,
It has no place.
The foul air reeks,
Must erase all trace.

This deadly unknown,
Of massive size,
Evil overgrown,
Shall meet its demise.

Call forth the powers,
The bird flying high.
This enemy of ours,
Now, in the light, die.

-------------------

Crushing You
(based on Break On Through by The Doors)

You know the day destroys the night
You won't win this day
Try to claw
Try to bite
Crushing you to the other side
Shadow, you'll never win this fight
Crushing you by the magic light, yeah

I chased the danger here
Found the changer there
But you won't succeed
You're in my sight
Crushing you to the other side
Crushing you by the magic light

Yeah!
C'mon, yeah

Everybody needs my saving
Everybody needs my saving
Owl fly high!
Owl fly high!
Owl fly high!
Owl fly high!

I found a bleakness in your face
Empty in your eyes
Arms that chain
Eyes that lie
Crushing you to the other side
Crushing you by the magic light
Crushing you, oww!
Oh, yeah!

Made the scene
At this freak
On this day
At my peak
The light is straight
Deep and wide
Crushing you to the other side
Crushing you by the magic light
Crushing you
Crushing you
Crushing you
Crushing you
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

[IKEA]

Short cheerful Tuuri
Good with a wrench or with words
Keeps the team going.

Braided young Reynir
Utterly clueless shepherd
Really hates spirits.

[corncobman]

Pg 481



By Your Eyes Onni
(based on For Your Eyes Only by Sheena Easton)

By your eyes Onni
Can save all of our lives
By your eyes Onni
The shadow cannot hide
You can see so much Onni
So much Onni that's new
I never felt so much in awe of you

By your eyes Onni, Onni rescue
You'll see what no-one else can see
And now we're breaking free
By your eyes Onni, Onni rescue
The power you have is much to me
The shadow's hold released from me
Onni rescue, Onni rescue

By your eyes Onni
This night is getting old
You just owned, Onni
That's all, it's just the truth
Maybe I'm total noob
Because I know you fly
But you're now here, perhaps we won't all die

By your eyes Onni, Onni rescue
You see what no one else can see,
And now we're breaking free
By your eyes Onni, Onni rescue
The helplessness has passed you see
I'm grateful to the powers that be
Onni rescue, by your eyes Onni

--------------------------------

Saviour Owl, Power Fowl

Exploding bright,
Blinding light,
From owl inside,
Mage most wise.

Power belies.
Saucer eyes,
Ghost's grip prised.
Tank side rised,

So high, the skies,
The owl can fight,
In all their sight,
It saved their lives.

Burning so bright,
Their saviour's might.
But beat, not quite,
The black, the blight.

[corncobman]

Pg 482

Ear Clipped by Scissor Snip

The soul ill-fated,
Cannot take shape,
Distance created,
They make their escape.

Its wide gaping maw,
Shows its displeasure.
No more life to draw,
It can no longer endure.

Reynir looks wordless,
The owl glancing back,
Young mage impressed,
Eyes staring, jaw slack.

In Sweden, blood squirts.
Scissors cut more than hair.
Boy it will sure hurt,
When Onni's back there!

No reaction, such a bore,
A babysitter, he's not.
Like he's been in the wars,
Physical danger is fraught.

Back to the squad drowsed,
Like their heads have spun.
The crew then all rouse,
Well, all apart from one.

[corncobman]

Pg 493

Slightly Dazed, Look Amazed

Still groggy is she,
Their leader most best.
Unwelcome sight to see,
As her face does suggest.

Please don't be hostile,
Tuuri had to drive away.
Find a camping spot while
There's still light of day.

Don't lose focus on,
On the task at hand.
Before they've all drawn
The creatures of this land.

Have to keep control.
What's this? Looks grim.
Stetching like poles,
Are they giant's limbs?

[IKEA]

There once was an Onni from Finland.
Whose life didn't go as his kin planned.
He ran out of fear
And cut off his ear
And couldn't go right back to Finland.
(I can't limerick, but Finland is really hard to rhyme)

[corncobman]

Pg 484

Shunt the Thing in Front

Cat tank ploughs through,
The long stalk-like legs,
Coming out into view,
Like a foul see-through egg.

A translucent flesh-pod,
With small beady eyes,
And two limbs like rods,
That's just dropping by.

But within the bulbousness,
Is a skeleton silhouette.
Physicality dispossessed,
Only undeath will beset.

Like a rotten kind of plant,
With horrid stalk and stem.
Up above them, like ants,
There's a whole army of them...

-----------------------------------

Gruesome Highway
(based on Lonesome Highway by Rory Gallagher)

Well it's a gruesome highway
That never seems to end
Well they just keep comin'
These creatures are such a pain

And it's now in my way
It's got throbbing veins
It looks like a light-bulb
But it could be our bane

Looks pretty frightenin'
It's a skull inside a brain
Sure don't look inviting
When you see those monster strains

Yea, Yea

I wish it were the morning
'Cause the night feels oh so long
With those in my eyes, yeah
It don't look good my friend
Tomorrow seems far away
Let's leave and never come return

Woohoo, Woooohoooo, Yeah-yeah-yeah-hea

[corncobman]

Pg. 485

Oh Crap, Splap Mishap

As a result of the ram,
The leggy thing collapsed.
To the floor it slams.
Just a sound of "SPLAP!"

The others just gaze,
Not venturing through.
Scared of the sun's rays?
Just blobs with a view.

The light's fading fast.
How long will they keep,
Until shadows' cast,
And out they all leap?

They bounds they must pass,
Of the city they're at.
While Mikkel just sassed,
Holding the confused cat.

"Shut up!" Sigrun says.
What use is he now?
While Emil is witless,
What, where, who and how?

He understands not,
What's been happening at all.
He wasn't ever taught,
The young Swedish screwball.

[corncobman]

Pg 486

We Don't Even Know Either
(based on I Don't Know Myself by the Who)

There's something in these things that stalk that can get my blood flowing
There's something in the way you fight that can destroy all buildings by blowing
Don't think about going to bed, 'cause monster skulls to bash lie there
Don't you say you don't know it, 'cause we don't even know either
Ooh we don't know either

I don't mind if I die once in a while
I don't mind if you cry once in a while
The trolls aren't big and wide as they might seem
I'm just trying to fight my way out with this team

Don't listen to the words I say, 'cause I can change my mind like I'm crazy
Don't wake up the Finnish mage, 'cause though he's sleeping he's not lazy
We just drove out and left, we didn't want to just die there
Don't you say you don't know it, 'cause we don't even know either
I said we don't even know either

I don't mind if I die once in a while
I don't mind if you cry once in a while
The trolls aren't big and wide as they might seem
I'm just trying to fight my way out with this team

Did you want to fight? I think you really do
Will you come with me? We are the awesome two
Hear my call, we are the most best fighters extreme
I'm just trying to fight my way out with this team

There's something out there we need to be killing, help me so that we can go to bed
Just keep the troll monster blood spilling, just keep bashing it until it's dead
Come on all of you creatures, we will just let fly there
Don't you say you don't know it, 'cause we don't even know either
I said we don't even know either

I don't mind if I die once in a while
And I don't mind if you cry once in a while

-------------------------------------

Stretched Like Lines, Very Bad Signs

Put on your gear,
Not quite time for bed.
Be ready to clear,
And bash in the head.

Be ready, stand-by,
Still a light's glower.
The sun in the sky,
Becoming ever lower.

The orange-red hues.
Show night's not that far.
While the light soothes,
No defence under stars.

The tank drives on past,
Between building and pool.
Snow melting fast,
Or troll-monster drool?

They continue to roll,
To get out of this zoo.
Before they're at their goal,
Something comes into view.

Overgrown, intertwined,
Branching and swirling.
Tentacles like vines,
Insidious in curling.

[corncobman]

Pg 487

Chop It Up, With A SHWUP!

A tangled mesh,
This sickly net.
Dead stringy flesh,
At the edge of sunset.

Cannot reverse,
There's no retreat.
They have to traverse,
Escape must complete.

Force they must brute.
To make it out ahead.
Hack at the roots,
Looks that they're dead,

Very good that it's so,
Indeed, thank the gods
In water, something grows,
Waiting for the poor sods...?

---------------------------

Another Sick-Looking Troll
(based on Another Brick In The Wall parts 1,2 and 3 by Pink Floyd)

Leave the buildings, get in motion
Leaving just the souls diseased
The shadows coming with no emotion
Denmark, what else do you have for me?
Denmark, whatcha have in store for me?
Chop it all, it was just a dead-looking wall
All in all, it was just the dead-looking wall

We don't need no back direction
We don't need no clutch control
No returning to the shadows
Monster, leave us all alone!
Hey, monster, leave us all alone!
All in all, it's just another sick-looking troll
All in all, you're just another sick-looking troll

We don't need no back direction
We don't need no clutch control
No returning to the shadows
Monster, leave us all alone!
Hey, monster, leave us all alone!
All in all, you're just another sick-looking troll
All in all, you're just another sick-looking troll

I don't need no vines around me
And I don't need to look behind me
I have seen the skin get up and crawl
Don't stop. There's no turning back at all
No. Don't stop. There's no turning back at all
All in all, it was all just the dead-looking wall
All in all, it was all just the dead-looking wall

[corncobman]

Pg. 488

So Lame, Emil Son, Get Your Flame On

Go out and keep watch,
So that nothing sneaks,
Please, no gunshots.
Quietly, so to speak.

While Sigrun and Mikkel,
Hacking, slashing away.
You know the drill,
Just keep stuff at bay.

"Okay." he responds.
Why is it always him?
The pretty-boy, blonde.
Alone on a whim.

Grumbling is Emil,
Flame-sprayer in hand.
It's all far too still,
He surveys the lost land.